We are officially one week into 2019 so let me start by saying Happy New Year!  If you are anything like most people you spent the first few days of the new year in reflection, looking back on 2018 with new lenses.  You may have contemplated the hand you played in the good, bad and ugly of it all, and if you are a Christian then you might have also asked yourself did, I pray enough?  Did I trust in the Lord to fulfill my needs? Was I obedient to his will? You reflected, chastised yourself, and by now you have created a game plan and ensured yourself that this year will be better!  After all this is the era of affirmations and abundant living!  If this is you awesome, you are on your way to setting the path for a great year, however if you are still struggling to move from the pain of the past into the amazing possibilities that await you in 2019 then this post is for you.  Well actually, this post is for us because I am right there with you.

I don’t know what your reflections were like, but mine left me angry with God. How do you start a new year ready to trust and obey the Lord when you are hurting due to unanswered prayers or heartbreak?   Well, it's not easy, but I know it can be done because that is the path, I am on right now.  I am declaring that I will push past the pain and make it back to my relationship with God.  My mom died after being diagnosed with lung cancer just 9 months before. She was a fighter and we did all we could to fight with her including alternative treatments, prayer, laying hands, affirmations etc. but at the end of the day God wanted her to come home and there was nothing left to do but say goodbye.  Those of you who know me knows what a positive and spiritual person I strive to be but I was hurt and angry at God for taking my mother before "I was ready." As the weeks turned into months God allowed me to begin to understand that when you love someone you will never be “ready” to say goodbye.  There would never have been a good time for him to take her so he did what God does and took her within his divine timing.

Let me be clear I still have my bad days and sometimes I struggle with asking God for anything but, then I am reminded of the woman with the issue of blood. (Luke 8:43-47) She pushed her way to Jesus in spite of the pain.  I am sure that she was in physical and emotional pain due to her illness.  She might even She may have even questioned her purpose or if God had forgotten her.  I honestly believe that she didn't cry out to Jesus out of fear of not being heard or worse being rejected. Although she had all of that going on she still pushed through her pain to touch him.  If she can do it then why can't we?

I am not saying forget the hurt or disappointments that took place.  Instead, I want you to be okay with however you are feeling whether it’s anger, frustration or sadness.  If it sucked for you own it because being real with yourself and God is the only way that he will be able to heal you.  The woman with the issue of blood was bleeding non-stop for twelve years and it wasn’t until she unashamedly went after her breakthrough that she was able to be healed.  God’s love is unconditional so there is no reason to hide your emotions from him.  It’s okay to be saved and salty at the same time, I know I am, but I will not allow it to negate all of the blessings the Lord has given me in the past or allow it to hinder my future.  I know that on the other side of this pain is my next level of purpose and power and I am inviting you to join me for the ride.  This year will be a great year filled with all that God has for me! What about you? It's time to push through the pain into the promises of 2019. Ready, Set, Grow!